Friday, August 19, 2011

A White Knight | The Post-Divorce Chronicles

Aug. 18, 2011

Rapunzel let down her hair.? Snow White got a kiss.? Cinderella fit the glass slipper.? We are surrounded by fairy tales and they all make us dream of our white knight showing up with a steed between his legs?yes, the double entendre was done on purpose?and rescuing us from ourselves to live out a life of hearts and flowers.? Here is a newsflash for you, you can be your own knight in shining armor and you can fulfill all your own needs.

Society tells us that we need to be part of a unit, a couple.? From the time we are little we hear about dating, going steady, getting engaged and getting married.? First comes love, then comes marriage then comes?.divorce.? When you aren?t following what society deems the right path, you have to forge your own path, and you won?t be the first to do this or the last.

So many people jump from one relationship to the next with barely a deep breath taken in between.? But why?? Because society tells us that we need to be part of a couple to be completed, although who wouldn?t want to be completed by Tom Cruise?? The reality is that Tom Cruise cannot complete you and neither can Tom, Dick, Harry or Jane.

How do you complete yourself?? You have to be comfortable with being with you.? Date yourself.? Sounds silly, doesn?t it?? I know it does, but trust me.? Go to dinner by yourself and then take yourself to see a movie.? Open a bottle of wine and rent a video.? Go for a walk or a run.? Do your shopping and grab some coffee or lunch.? Don?t take it to go, but sit there and eat and drink.? At first, it will feel conspicuous and uncomfortable.? But, eventually it will feel empowering to take care of you and your needs.

Those weekends when you are frantically looking for a date or a girlfriend or a guy friend to grab a drink with, slow down and just decide to be with you.? Spend that time journaling, goal setting and getting your life straight.? Take care of your honey do list, because you are the honey now.? Organize your life and organize your thoughts.? Learn to love yourself.

Once you realize you are your own white knight take a look around and more than likely that is when your prince shows up.? Don?t worry, you will recognize him or her.? They will love you for you and appreciate you for you.? They won?t try to change you or dress you or tell you what you are doing wrong.? They will support you and understand you.? They will be your equal.

You will have broken your own cycle of jumping from one relationship to the next, and that relationship that you end up in with yourself will be better than any fairy tale with the best happily ever after, because no matter what else happens in your life, you will always know you can be your own white knight and always ride off into the sunset with a smile.

Source: http://www.postdivorcechronicles.com/2011/08/a-white-knight/

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